Things I suppose I might have expected from chronic sleep deprivation.

1. Obviously, feeling tired.

2. Forgetting the words for...things.  Everything?  The number of times I say, "I just need to pick up that...aw, shit...the..uh, thingy!  You know what I mean!" is staggering.  What's interesting is it isn't that I've just forgotten what it was I wanted - I can remember the thing, can picture it in my head, can describe it (big fluffy thing, need it to dry off with after my shower!), but just can't remember the word.  Also, I've noticed that adults happily supply me with the right word, or are happy to guess, but children?  Children just stand and stare at me and wonder how I could have gotten so big, but remained so ill informed.

3. Also - forgetting people's names.  I am usually pretty good with names, even more so with faces.  The other day, we were at the park and I just could not for life of me remember this one woman's name.  I've known her for at least six months, have had several conversations with her, consider it a budding friendship, etc. but all day I just could not pull up her name.  It would have been totally embarrassing to ask someone, although hey lookie, I'm embarrassing myself now, aren't I? 

I know we all have times when a word, or a name is temporarily irretrievable, but I find it lasts longer.  For example, I've been intermittently trying to remember the name of our property manager, because I need to call and ask her a question.  It's nothing particularly pressing, but it's been about two weeks now, and her name just isn't coming to me.  I'm sure her number is in my contact list on my phone, so it's not a totally lost cause, but what the heck? 

4.  While I'm blaming my lack of sleep, I'm going to go ahead and chalk up the hideous state of my skin at the moment to chronic sleep deprivation. 

5.  Impatience.  Ha ha.  Actually to be honest, let's call it "quick to enrage"...and it is a quickness to rageful feelings about the oddest assortment of things!  Sort of like Road Rage (although interestingly enough, I haven't experienced any of that), but Junk Mail Rage and Goddamn It SpellCheck, I Know That Word Already Rage and Why Isn't That Book At The Library Rage and Why Does My Neighbor's Dog Always Have To Wander Right Up To My Door And Make My Dog Crazy Rage.  I suppose I have temporarily lost the ability to let the very smallest of things roll off my back, which really doesn't say much for anything bigger than the very smallest of things ie. everything else.

6.  Being a complete and total conversational dud.  I just lack the energy.  I won't remember what you said anyway, and I certainly won't remember what I started to tell you...

Oh.  I've gone and made it sound dire...  I do get some sleep.  Some mornings, I get to sleep in a little (if I'm able to fall back asleep) and I often fall asleep when I'm putting the boy to bed in the evening, but I don't think I've slept more than three hours at a stretch in over a year.  I do sleep, a bit, but it isn't the stuff dreams are made of.

Comments

[Beachbum]

Hugs, friend...it will happen (that sleep stuff) again and you'll be a ok again. Till then, I don't mind having partial conversations with you about, well, you know, things. We can make great comic relief for each other!

[Rebecca H.]

Oh, you *know* I feel your pain on this one. And I've not been experiencing it for a year, just several months. May this go away for both of us and soon.

[citrus]

sounds like lead poisoning to me , but seriously, how's your diet , you're pupating into becoming a 'mother', the final stage of human life where you call things by a similar but ridiculous word, say no without reason, in fact act totally unreasonable, become over protective and overbearing , you're becoming your mother.
Hitler was a 'mother', any thoughts on Poland.

[Dawn]

Scary to admit but I do some of that stuff with 7 plus hours of sleep!! Wishing for some good zzzz's for you soon and I likey the title pic :)

[Sahara]

I've been chalking those things (I'm doing these all too!) up to chronic stress. I get decent sleep in terms of hours/night so I'm guessing serious stress is doing it to me. Like Beachbum, I'm happy to have brief nonsensical conversations with you and we can just refer to each other as "hey you!" and I won't be offended.

Or even better, I'd be happy to take the little pears for a bit (we can go down to your nearby park or something) and you can sleep at home for a while. (Have you seriously thought of asking for some type of regular relief like that, I'm sure a bunch of us would be happy to help. Goodness knows I've had to humble myself and accept help lately)

In return, I ask you to force the ex to sign the #%&*ing divorce papers, call the utility co's and make a strong case that I deserve some bill forgiveness, and explain to Nana for the 1 millionth time that she needs to rest and not pace and there isn't a guy outside her window. Oh, wait this is your pity-fishing blog post! ;)

[ダコタ 長財布]

One of the best things that you can have when you are planning a party or event of any size is a written party timeline and master shopping list.